“You may fear the Lord has passed you by, but it is not so. He who counts the stars and calls them by name is in no danger of forgetting His own children. He knows your situation as thoroughly as if you were the only creature He ever made and the only saint He ever loved. Approach Him and be at peace.” - Charles Spurgeon
Today is a "highs and lows" day.
Lows:
Today was induction day.
Today we brought Ky's ashes home.
Today I realized Shay and I no longer can heal together like we did last week due to his returning to work.
We picked up my car from the shop and spent $$$$.
Today I lost it like a crazy person when Shay got home.
Highs:
I realized the random number that had text me a picture of a rainbow promise on our way home from the hospital on Ky's birth day, and had sent me an article on grieving loss by John Piper, was my OBGYN. I only realized it because he sent me the results of my lab work and placenta pathology exam.
The results were all negative-- no thyroid issues, infection, glucose disorder, blood clotting issue, etc.
Shay went on a walk with me.
I jogged for 5 minutes and it felt good.
I was reminded by friends of the following:
The desire for family is a God-given desire
Vulnerability breeds vulnerability
God lost His son. His thoughts regarding our grief is not academic.
We are not as those who grieve without hope. 1 Thess. 4:13.