2 years old
It is so much easier to feel nothing than to take myself back to July 1 two years ago. Today actually kind of snuck up on me. I had...
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When You Least Expect It
They say grief hits you when you least expect it. I had one of those moments last week. Beckett (our 2nd son, though I don’t refer to him...
Now that the fog is clearing...
Beckett is now 11 weeks old. I've heard this first 3-month period referred to as "the haze" or "the fog" or "survival". I've decided...
One week to go
Dates haven't meant a whole lot to me over the last year. Kyler's birthday was important, I very much knew it was Mother's Day, etc., but...
Update on PAL (pregnancy after loss)
Similarly to Kyler's 1 year birthday post, I haven't felt the urge to write anything for "the next girls" experiencing the PAL journey,...
One Year
The one year mark of Kyler's birth was much different -- and better -- than I had anticipated. I didn't dread it until a week or so...
Viability
The bit of cynicism in me has ignored the typically relief-giving checkpoints in this pregnancy. I think you're supposed to give a sigh...
9 months
In trying to stay true to the point of this blog (--> for the next girl finding comfort in having similar thoughts), it's only fair to...
Waiting
We continue to say that every day is a day farther from Ky, his memory is rougher, and it's harder to remember. It's true in one sense,...
"to comfort others with the comfort you have received"
I got a message from a girl who makes and sells jewelry, and has decided to rebrand her business such that it provides comfort and love...
Both-And
You know how people say, "Never tell a woman she's too much?" I think I've taken that to mean that, if you're not careful, people will...
Chatterbox
Mom and I are in Iceland because I have some $ meant for Ky, extra PTO (saved for maternity leave), and well... why not. I want to do...
The Kyler Project
Happy 4 month birthday, little guy. Feels like an eternity in some ways. You've changed my life immensely, and I'm quite confident the...
Boomerang Effect
A bonus "example story", if you will, from the previous stupid-long post on arguments against God due to pain and suffering. The whole...
Living for Happiness vs. Meaning
A thoughtful woman I've never met sent me Tim Keller's book on Walking With God Through Pain and Suffering. Good gracious this book has...
The Next Girl.
I’m writing this for the girl that comes after me, so that maybe she can learn from something we’ve walked through, or can identify...
Why Do I Cry?
Shay and I were hesitant to say it aloud for a while, but crying about Kyler and talking about him can sometimes feel kind of odd. Like,...
On The Rock
There are alot of things to be said about Patti Silvers. But someone else is gonna have to tell you, because she'll never toot her own...
Ky's Bunny
I wish I could make it abundantly clear how much more assured I am of God's strength. His care for me. His presence in the details. His...
"Boring" Church Services
I remember being at a retreat in middle school that was led by guest speaker whom I thought was hilarious. I only say that because this...
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